The mere mention of “couples” or encountering it in a TV show or movie often prompts many of us to flee. There’s a misconception that couples therapy is only for relationships on the brink of failure, seen as a last resort. However, Couples Therapy is actually a proactive and beneficial step for any relationship.
Couples Therapy: What is it all about?
Couples therapy provides a guide to help couples resolve their conflict, develop their intimacy and friendship, and discover their dreams and life’s purpose. You and your partner will complete questionnaires that are empirically validated to help identify your relationship strengths and weaknesses. The course will provide you with tools for healing your wounds and processing fights. You and your partner can also learn techniques to increase intimacy and reduce relapses.
Check in Tips for Relationships
Use these seven “relationship check-in” tips to improve your relationship with your partner.
Love and Appreciation
This tip is to respectfully ask if you both have expressed love and appreciation for each other, and if so, how you could improve. The more specific you are, the better.
Intimacy
It is vital to be clear when discussing how this relationship has gone or whether it requires improvement. Be clear about how you can improve this. We can’t expect our partner to improve without knowing how. So, be sure you discuss both the factors that hinder intimacy and the ones that encourage it.
Date Nights
If this is happening or has happened, ask yourself if it needs to be improved, or whether you need to get started.
Goals
You can ask each other about your goals for this week, next month and even the year to come. Ask your partner if they can assist you in reaching your goals.
Support
You may want to consider how supportive you have been towards your partner. We may need to support our partner who is a CEO by helping them make their morning coffee or if they are a parent at home, by helping them with the bedtime routines. It is vital to support each other, no matter what role you play. You can both ask each other for support.
Communication
How well have you and your partner communicated throughout the week or this month? What can be done to improve it or what are the positives? The more specific you are, the better.
Emotional Attention
Talk about your emotional health, starting today and continuing through this month. Your partner or you may have not had the chance to reconnect with your emotions due to other things that demand immediate attention.
Gottman Relationship Test
The Gottman Institute developed a tool to assess couples’ relationships. It is called the Gottman relationship check-up . Gottman observed that most couples therapists did not have the time necessary to conduct a comprehensive assessment. The Gottman relationship Checkup is a simple, low-cost assessment tool. The Gottman relationship Checkup streamlines and systematizes the assessment of relationships. The couple’s therapist receives personalized feedback. It also offers specific treatment interventions based on responses from the couple. The client is also given the opportunity to provide comments on their responses. It may take a little longer to finish the Gottman relationship checkup, but you should expect it to be between 1 and 2 hours.